The Dude Diet: Addendum

Because of the overwhelming response to last week’s post, I have decided that it is only fair to update you on Logan’s progress. I also received several inquiries regarding the details of the dude diet, so I have briefly outlined its components below. The best part about the dude diet is that nothing is completely off-limits. It’s all about moderation and being less of an idiot…

the-dude-diet
The dude.

The Dude Diet: Pretty much the most obvious diet in the world.

1. Limit bread, rice, pasta, and potato intake. Good general rule: If it’s white, think twice. The amount of white flour and processed food that I have watched dudes consume in a single day makes me want to die. Oh, and “wraps” are not any better for you than bread, capiche? Try some whole grains (quinoa, brown rice, etc.), they taste good. Fact.

2. Eat less dairy.Cream, butter, cheese, ice cream, etc. should be eaten sparingly. You know this, tubby.

3. Eat more fish, pork, and chicken. Grilled, braised, roasted. These terms are your friends.

4. Stop eating things that are fried. Seriously. Please stop.

5. Stop eating so much sugar. Candy is not a snack. Im sorry? You’re a stress eater? Put down the sour patch kids and go for a run, fatty.

6. Pay attention to sauces, condiments, and dressings. Dudes rarely consider the terrifying amount of fat and calories in these things. Start using your head and use less of them.

7. Eat at least 5 servings of vegetables a day and three servings of fruit. If you make a conscious effort to do this, you will get necessary nutrients and you will also be too full to eat crap.

8. Drink responsibly. Relax, by that I mean at least entertain the idea of drinking light beer, or switching to a lower calorie cocktail when you’re out. It’s called a beer belly for a reason.

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These beers are both light and small. #dudedietdrinks

9. Eat more slowly. First of all, shoving food in your mouth is disgusting. I have literally seen Logan put a sandwich in his mouth and then give it a PUSH before taking a bite. You should never need to push something further into your mouth before chewing it. EVER. I have also witnessed him put HANDFULS of things in his mouth (jelly beans, popcorn, M&Ms). I wanted to cry. Eating more slowly gives you a chance to recognize when you’re full. It is also more civilized.

10. EXERCISE PORTION CONTROL. This is probably the most important aspect of the dude diet. No matter what you are eating, do not eat to the point where you make yourself feel so ill that you are unable to perform necessary tasks (i.e. do the dishes, get to a party, have sex, etc.). Thanks.

I would like to compliment Logan on his remarkable progress since he started the dude diet. I can’t be sure how much weight he’s lost so far (I’m not running a Weight Watchers clinic), but I have observed some very promising changes in both his behavior and physique. He called yesterday and said he was going to pick up a salad and then go to a meeting. I honestly thought I had misheard him. I felt overwhelmingly proud, but I managed to contain my excitement and respond, “Cool. What meeting?” I find that it is necessary to dole out praise sparingly…just enough to maintain Logan’s motivation, but not so much that he thinks he’s a supermodel and therefore doesn’t need to continue with the dude diet. (I should mention that after last week’s post, Logan thinks he’s some sort of internet celebrity, which is going to his head. I need to keep his diva tendencies in check.)

This week’s most successful dude diet dish: chicken and vegetables with brown rice vermicelli in ginger-soy broth.

chicken-and-vegetables-with-brown-rice-vermicelli-and-ginger-soy-broth
#dudediet

It was a surprisingly comforting and hearty meal, but still packed with nutrients and practically fat-free. Logan gave it two very enthusiastic thumbs up. I chose to ignore his suggestion that maybe I should use thicker noodles next time. “You know, like those fat flat noodles, linguini or something.” I calmly reminded him that the reason I did not use “linguini or something” was because he is on a diet. It’s a learning curve. Lord give me strength…

Chicken and vegetables with brown rice vermicelli in ginger-soy broth: (Serves 4)

Ingredients:
1 red bell pepper
2 cups broccoli florets
1 cup sugar snap peas
1 cup sliced shitake mushrooms
2 medium carrots
2 boneless skinless chicken breasts
1 package brown rice vermicelli noodles
For the broth:
1 yellow onion, thinly sliced
1 medium carrot, diced
1 stalk celery, diced
1 quart low sodium chicken stock
1 large shallot, minced
2 large garlic cloves, minced
1 ½ tbsp ginger, minced
2 tsp dark sesame oil, divided
4 tbsp soy sauce
1 tbsp honey
½-1 tsp chili paste (optional…but recommended if you like serious heat)

Preparing your broth:

-Saute the minced garlic, ginger, and shallots in 1 tsp sesame oil over low heat until fragrant (about 2 minutes). Add the diced carrots and celery. Saute 5 minutes until vegetables are soft.

-Add the soy sauce, honey, and chili paste if using, and sauté for 30 seconds.

-Add the chicken stock. Bring liquid to a boil, then lower to a simmer. Allow to simmer for least 30 minutes.

-Strain the broth (to remove any solids) and return it to the heat. Add the onions and allow to simmer for another half hour before serving.

-Thinly slice the red bell pepper. Peel the carrots, and slice them on a diagonal into oblong discs about ¼ inch thick. Wash shitakes well, remove stems, and cut into ¼ thick slices. Remove florets from head of broccoli.

Cook your vegetables. I chose to steam my vegetables in order to eliminate the need for oil, but you are welcome to stir fry them with a tbsp or so of sesame oil in a wok or large pan!

You have 3 options for steaming your vegetables:

1. If you have a steamer, I’m fucking jealous. Steam all of the vegetables in it.

2. If you do not have a steamer, welcome to the club. Good news, I can show you how to make one. Place all of the vegetables in a strainer/colander. Find a pot large enough that you can rest the colander in. Fill the pot ¼ full with water. Bring the water to a boil. Rest your “steamer basket” in the pot and then cover with a large lid or tin foil. Steam for approximately 15 minutes or until the vegetables are cooked al dente (meaning they have a little crunch).

3. If you do not have a strainer that fits in a pot, place all the vegetables in a large pan with a cup of water. Cover with a lid, and cook over medium heat until the vegetables are cooked al dente (approx 10-15 minutes).

chicken-and-vegetables-with-brown-rice-vermicelli-and-ginger-soy-broth

Cooking your chicken: (Do this while your vegetables are steaming!)

-Slice the chicken into pieces approximately ½ inch thick.

-Heat a tsp of sesame oil over medium heat and add the chicken and 1 tbs soy sauce.

-Saute until chicken is cooked through. This will only take about 3 minutes max. Set pan aside.

Cooking your vermicelli:

-Follow the package directions. DUH.
Serving your chicken and vegetables in ginger soy broth:

-Combine chicken and vegetables in a pan and heat through (1-2 minutes)

-In large bowls, add the vermicelli first, then add chicken and vegetables.

-Pour about one cup of the broth with the onions into each bowl and serve! Light, but filling, and delicious. Happy me, happy boyfriend. The dude diet soldiers on.

Chicken and vegetables with brown rice vermicelli in ginger-soy broth

Yield: 4 servings

Ingredients

  • 1 red bell pepper
  • 2 cups broccoli florets
  • 1 cup sugar snap peas
  • 1 cup sliced shitake mushrooms
  • 2 medium carrots
  • 2 boneless skinless chicken breasts
  • 1 package brown rice vermicelli noodles
  • For the broth:
  • 1 yellow onion, thinly sliced
  • 1 medium carrot, diced
  • 1 stalk celery, diced
  • 1 quart low sodium chicken stock
  • 1 large shallot, minced
  • 2 large garlic cloves, minced
  • 1 ½ tbsp ginger, minced
  • 2 tsp dark sesame oil, divided
  • 4 tbsp soy sauce
  • 1 tbsp honey
  • ½-1 tsp chili paste (optional…but recommended if you like serious heat)

Instructions

  1. Start by preparing your broth. Saute the minced garlic, ginger, and shallots in 1 tsp sesame oil over low heat until fragrant (about 2 minutes). Add the diced carrots and celery. Saute 5 minutes until vegetables are soft. Add the soy sauce, honey, and chili paste if using, and sauté for 30 seconds. Add the chicken stock. Bring liquid to a boil, then lower to a simmer. Allow to simmer for least 30 minutes.
  2. Strain the broth (to remove any solids) and return it to the heat. Add the onions and allow to simmer for another half hour before serving.
  3. Thinly slice the red bell pepper. Peel the carrots, and slice them on a diagonal into oblong discs about ¼ inch thick. Wash shitakes well, remove stems, and cut into ¼ thick slices. Remove florets from head of broccoli.
  4. Steam your vegetables. You can do this in one of three ways: If you have a steamer, I’m fucking jealous. Steam all of the vegetables in it. If you do not have a steamer, welcome to the club. Good news, I can show you how to make one. Place all of the vegetables in a strainer/colander. Find a pot large enough that you can rest the colander in. Fill the pot ¼ full with water. Bring the water to a boil. Rest your “steamer basket” in the pot and then cover with a large lid or tin foil. Steam for approximately 15 minutes or until the vegetables are cooked al dente (meaning they have a little crunch). If you do not have a strainer that fits in a pot, place all the vegetables in a large pan with a cup of water. Cover with a lid, and cook over medium heat until the vegetables are cooked al dente (approx 10-15 minutes).
  5. While the vegetables are steaming, cook your chicken. Slice the chicken into pieces approximately ½ inch thick. Heat a tsp of sesame oil over medium heat and add the chicken and 1 tbs soy sauce. Saute until chicken is cooked through. This will only take about 3 minutes max. Set pan aside.
  6. Follow the package directions to cook your vermicelli.
  7. Combine chicken and vegetables in a pan and heat through (1-2 minutes). In large bowls, add the vermicelli first, then add chicken and vegetables. Pour about one cup of the broth with the onions into each bowl and serve!
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  • amazing. men suck because they don’t get fat, ever. number 1 on the list should be “no more extra large jalapeno pizzas at 2am”.. should be a shocker to many!

    -Sara
    http://www.eatfeelfresh.com