The Dude Diet: 5-Day Jumpstart Plan

How’s it hanging in this fine New Year, dudes?

If you’re anything like the dudes I know, shit may have hit the fan slightly over the holiday season. No judgment. I obviously feel you—as Logan likes to say, “So many pigs in a blanket, so little time.” But with the holidays in the rearview, I urge you to take advantage of 2017’s gloriously blank canvas by fully embracing The Dude Diet lifestyle. Starting ASAP.

Because I’m committed to ridding the world of man boobs helping the dude community get its act together, I created The Dude Diet 5-Day Jumpstart. This simple plan is exactly what it sounds like—five days’ worth of Dude Diet meals to facilitate healthier habits and fast-track your wonderland body. It isn’t a cleanse. It’s not a crash diet, or a get thin quick fix (sorry). You won’t wake up next week with Timberlake abs and a free pass to crush Dominos’ for the rest of the year. However, you will definitely feel better (and look decently hotter) after five days of these dank, cleanish meals. Plus, spending some quality time cooking will up both your culinary street cred and your comfort level in the kitchen, which is always a plus.

A few quick notes to help you dominate your 5-Day Jumpstart:

1. All of the recipes listed below are in my book, The Dude Diet. I’ve included page numbers for easy reference. If you don’t have the book, you can buy it here, borrow it from a friend, or check it out at your local library.
2. Most of the recipes make 2-4 servings, so I recommend tackling this plan with family/friends/significant others/roommates. If you do end up with leftovers, you can always eat them in place of other planned meals. For example, if you have leftovers from Day 2’s Shepherd’s Pie, feel free to replace lunch or dinner on Days 3 or 4 with the leftovers. Easy.
3. If you must eat between meals, please stick to fruits, vegetables, or one of the snack options listed below:

Sriracha Hummus (page 114)
Maple-Bourbon Roasted Almonds (page 131)
Coconut-Lime Chia Pudding (page 304)
Chocolate-Almond “Cookie Dough” Bites (page 313)

4. This plan is most effective when you’re off the sauce. I know that may sound daunting, but five days sans booze is, in fact, doable. I believe in you.
5. Exercise will enhance the awesomeness of your Jumpstart, so please do it if you can. For the infinitieth time, sitting in a steam room or sauna does not count.
6. Be a planner. I recommend doing one big shop for everything except the fish (which you should try to pick up the day of, or one day before, cooking) prior to starting the plan. To make things easy, do the plan Monday-Friday so that you can spend a few hours shopping and prepping over the weekend.

Godspeed, dudes. Your wonderland body awaits…

The Dude Diet 5-Day Jumpstart:

DAY 1
Breakfast: Big Green Scramble (page 59)
Lunch: Southwestern Sweet Potato Salad (page 230) OR Manly Mediterranean Salad (page 241)
*If you absolutely must have meat at every meal, you may add diced Idiotproof Chicken Breasts (page 257) to either salad.
Dinner: Parchment Salmon with Vegetables (page 264) 

DAY 2
Breakfast: Green God Smoothie (page 49)
Lunch: Chopped Chicken Club Salad with Honey-Mustard Dressing (page 187)
Dinner: Dude Diet Shepherd’s Pie (page 84)

DAY 3
Breakfast: Apple Pie Overnight Oats (page 37)
Lunch: Smoky Black Bean Chicken Stew (page 270)
Dinner: Asian Kale Salad with Chia Crusted Tuna (page 178) OR Summer Salad with Pan-Seared Salmon (page 188)
*If you don’t eat fish, sub Idiotproof Chicken Breasts in either salad (page 257).

DAY 4
Breakfast: Amped Up Avocado Toast (page 44)
Lunch: Buffalo Chicken Salad (page 176)
Dinner: Basil Tofu Lettuce Wraps (page 201) OR Southwestern Stuffed Peppers (page 81)

DAY 5
Breakfast: Go-To Frittata (page 258)
Lunch: Vegetable Soba Noodles with Peanut Sauce (page 238)
Dinner: Coconut Green Curry Chicken (page 217) OR Epic Meatloaf (page 71) and Cauliflower Puree with Parmesan and Chives (page 243)

Just in case feeling and looking great isn’t enough motivation, I’m doing a little GIVEAWAY to incentivize your Dude Dieting efforts. I’m gifting one lucky human a Cuisinart Elite Mini Prep Food Processor, a 12-inch Lodge Cast Iron Skillet, and a Dude Diet T-shirt of your choosing. To enter the giveaway, simply post a photo of your 5-Day Jumpstart creations OR a photo of you and your book on Instagram using the hashtags #NEWYEARNEWDUDE and #TheDudeDiet by 11:59pm on Monday, January 16. Bonus points for caption creativity and multiple entries! Winner will be announced on Tuesday, January 17, here on the blog and on Instagram (@serenagwolf). May the odds be ever in your favor.